5 signs your partner is emotionally neglecting youadmin
No relationship is perfect, everyone has bad days and sometimes just doesn’t have the energy to be fully there for their partner. However, if certain patterns emerge over a long period of time and you feel alone with your problems in the long run and in a certain way let down, this will damage your psyche and your relationship in the long run. So that the emotional neglect does not develop in a toxic direction and maybe even mutate into emotional abuse, you should recognize and address the first signs in good time:
1. He*She doesn’t want to talk to you
“A partner who avoids conversation deprives you of one of the most important parts of an emotional connection,” says clinical psychologist Dr. Carla Marie Manly in conversation with Bustle . Manly explains that conversations are one of the most emotionally connecting and important elements of a healthy relationship, so this should already be a big red flag for partners.
Also, if your partner seems bored when you try to talk about your interests, this can be a sign of emotional neglect. Sure, he*she doesn’t have to be interested in the same things as you, but it’s not too much to ask to listen and ask the other a few questions, says Manly.
2. You don’t have discussions
It may sound nice at first to never argue or engage in strenuous discussions (at times), but in fact it can also be quite unhealthy and falls under the category of emotional neglect.
“Conflict and healthy arguments are a sign that you’re staying connected with your partner and want to solve problems together,” therapist Latasha Matthews told Bustle . Always experiencing resignation and indifference gives the other person the feeling of being unimportant or not being taken seriously.
3. He*She shuts himself off from you
Do you sometimes feel like you’re talking to a wall or what you say doesn’t get through to your partner at all? You may also wonder what is going on inside him/her since he/she hardly lets you share his/her thoughts. “This is also a sign of neglect, since the needs of the other person are not taken into account and one’s own are not expressed,” explains therapist Jordan Madison – although this would be very important for a functioning relationship. That way, nobody’s emotional needs are being met.
4. He*She does not stick to agreements and forgets appointments
Your partner makes promises but doesn’t keep them and regularly sweats out appointments that you made together? This is another form of emotional neglect. Therapist Madison explains, “Dealing with a partner who is inconsistent can make you feel like you can’t count on them to be there when you need them.”
5. The sex always starts with you
You hardly have sex anymore and if you do, it’s only because you initiate it. There’s never time for foreplay and you hardly feel an emotional bond during sex? “For those who value sexual intimacy, having sex without an emotional connection can feel very neglected and lonely,” says psychologist Manly. If your sex life is leaving you emotionally unsatisfied, communicate that to your partner. Maybe there is a deeper reason and you will find a solution. If the matter has been dragging on for a long time, it will probably not resolve itself without a conversation.