How do you deal with being jealous of friends?


How do you deal with being jealous of friends?

In principle, we wish our friends only the best. After all, we really like them and they are wonderful people (with flaws). Nevertheless, a spark of jealousy can creep in if he or she gets something that we really want or if it is easy for him or her and difficult for us.

This is not uncommon and quite normal. The feeling of jealousy itself isn’t bad or toxic or negative either – it’s what we do with that feeling and how we react to it that matters. We can use it, for example, to improve ourselves or to recognize what we want and pursue it.

We have some tips on how best to deal with jealousy in friendships:

Take it as an incentive
Jealousy in particular can help you to find out for yourself what you want in life and what you still want to experience. So take a good look at the feeling of jealousy and don’t push it aside because you feel like you shouldn’t be jealous. Give the feeling space and explore for yourself: What do I want? And how can I achieve it? Then you can turn jealousy into gratitude: Because your friend has shown you what you really want.

Practice creates masters
Do you remember when you were so terribly jealous of your friend in high school because she had much nicer hair or fewer pimples or better grades? Back then, the feeling was so strong that you could hardly turn it into something productive.

It’s different now. You are in control of how you react to situations involving jealousy and whether or not you are (excuse the language) bitchy. The more you allow yourself to feel and analyze it, the more practice you will get with jealousy and how to deal with it, and that will lead to you becoming more confident and satisfied with yourself.

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Work on your self worth
Each of us has strengths and weaknesses. Different people find different things easier. That is normal. The more you learn to accept your own weaknesses and to love and celebrate your strengths, the less jealous you feel towards your friends.

Realize that you only get a glimpse
Even if you’re good friends and you get to see a lot of his or her life, you still never know the whole story. Because as you know yourself, you may not share everything with friends and share your successes rather than the failures, trauma or difficulties you have. Others do it very similarly.

tell them
You can be jealous and still be really happy for someone. These two feelings are not mutually exclusive. On the contrary, this spark of jealousy can show that you are all the more happy because success would also be important to you. Just say that and address it, “Wow, I’m so happy for you that you got this promotion! You worked so hard for it. I’m a little jealous and I’m excited if that happens to me too. So awesome that you are already experiencing it! Congratulations!”

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